Over a year and a half ago, I asked God why I keep coming across these men who say they love me BUT! There was always a but. But give me time. But I'm not ready to commit. But my divorce isn't final and I'm not doing anything to make it final. But I'm waiting on God (while God is waiting on them). I could go on and on.
God revealed to me that this was not love! Love is an action word. Show me without the buts. God also revealed that I needed to change. I had to stop giving such a special part of me to men that were not able to give all of themselves to me.
My conversation with God went like this. But God then I won't feel comforted. But God I love being held. But God I need to be touched. But God! He spoke back saying well keep doing what you're doing and keep getting the same results. I had to be obedient.
I choose to be celibate for this reason. I gave up something that I enjoy, love or thought I could live without to receive love I cannot live without. That act of obedience has helped me align my life with HIM and not on man or men. I remember Ruth was not out looking for a man when Boaz found her. She was about the work God had for her. I am now about my Fathers business and if/when my Boaz finds me I can present myself as God desires.
No comments:
Post a Comment